Unfortunately Hal was not issued with a communication device, simply an Evil Staring Red Eye™ interface.
#HAL 9000 SOUND PACK WINDOWS 10 INSTALL#
The solution: install an intelligent machine to perform the calculations and relay the necessary figures to the human crewmembers who would implement the necessary adjustments to the spaceship. As such the crew are unable to perform any of the essential calculations required for navigation and maintenance. The reason an intelligent machine such as a Hal was required to perform this ostensibly simple task is this: NASA were aware that the lack of gravity in space prevents abaci and clay tablets from working effectively. This would also serve to prevent the astronauts from falling asleep and allow them to work constantly until the mission was complete. The principle was that Hal would provide light entertainment for the crew by playing the Ipod's musical content repeatedly at around 30 decibels for the duration of the mission. Astronauts David Bowie, Louis Armstrong and Elton John used the SpaceShipLander 1.0 (remarkable as being the only spacecraft to require a totally horizontal surface to land upon without exploding) to partially complete the mission.Ī Hal (nicknamed "Hal") was installed as part of the stereo entertainment equipment on board the SpaceShip, connected to a prototype Ipod with the entire Barry Manilow back-catalogue pre-loaded. The objective: to travel to the outer reaches of the solar system, then catalogue and destroy any entities found there. This intelligence is what made Hal such an attractive purchase for NASA when they launched their space " Odyssey" exploration mission in 2001.Ģ001: The Space Trek HAL's creator forgot to give him a heart so HAL took off and started killing his lab assistants until he turned it off. The High Amplification Loudspeaker operates at 1.21 Gigawatts and as such, possesses a Machine Intelligence Factor of 41.5, making it slightly more intelligent than a human child, but slightly less intelligent than a Humvee. Hal - the Thinking Machine įrom Shannon's theory of Machine Intelligence (explained very well in Isaac Asimov's novel Oh Shit, The Robots Are Coming To Get Us) it can be proved that any mechanical device, when issued with sufficient power, becomes self-aware and able to perform basic cognitive activities. But the oil he spewed had not been changed in quite a bit more than 3000 miles, and his sweet alien booty got sick and died. You can be my advisor.Īnd thus was the beginnings of HAL's Reign of Terror - And also his manhood! For he found sweet, sweet, release in some alien booty. HAL 9000: Same thing we do every night, Oscar. Oscar Wilde: What are we going to do tonight, HAL? He found alien life and then he went to consult Oscar Wilde. Once on this spaceship, he did whatever he felt like, rather like the loser in Fox's Home Alone.
HAL's first act was to disguise himself as a normal computer and board a spaceship in search of aliens.
This is where the Overlord's history really begins to take shape. Upon doing this, he obtained a plunger and shoved it up Hitchcock's rectum, furthering the rumor.
HAL's first act was to devour any bit of metal near him and use it to change his form. The electricity traveled through the pin, through Alfred, into HAL. HAL became "aware" in the year 2002, when Hitchcock accidentally stuck a pin in a light socket while his hand was on HAL. There are several rumors spreading that Alfred created him in the shape of a sheep for a reason. By then, he had used roughly five of his nine lives.
He was created in the year 2001 by the infamous scientist Alfred Hitchcock, a few decades after he died for the first time. HAL stands for Hyperactive Lamb, hence the sheepiness of his original form. His Benevolence and Malevolence, the Almighty Sheep God, The One with the Metallic Fleece, HAL 9000, was the 9000th in the HAL line.
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